Spring Breakers and Killers: Foreva

(Source)

Saw Spring Breakers yesterday afternoon (and the Bling Ring trailer in theaters!)

Seeing Simon Killer with a Q&A tomorrow with Antonio Campos and the rest of the Borderline Films (NYU Alum) gang.

And yes, I am making it my mission to casually brush up against Antonio Campos' beard.

(Shh don't tell him I've already done this multiple times without his knowledge.)

I never know how to put apostrophes in places like that.

People, stop having 's's at the ends of your names.

At any rate, good movies comin' out ya'lllll That's what life is about.

*whispers* ~~~~spring break foreva~~~~

I will have a proper Spring Breakers review up shortly, until then, I thought you'd enjoy this update, and the photo above

4 Books for People Who Hate Reading (Under $10)

Water for Elephants

By Sara Gruen

            Let’s get to the point: This book is entertaining, an easy read, and if you hate it you can at least watch the new movie and compare.

            The book follows an elderly Jacob Jancowski as he recalls his days as a young man in his twenties working at the “Benzini Brothers Most Spectacular Show on Earth!”

Adventure, romance, history, set between the circus world of the early Great Depression and modern day.

             None of it’s remotely cheesy…in fact, it’s beautifully awesome. Not to mention you can buy this book for under $10 just about anywhere (Just $1.99 on Amazon kindle!) Well worth the modest pricing.

Go Ask Alice

By Anonymous / Beatrice Sparks

            This is constantly recommended by reading-haters. Some say it’s because of content and it’s quick pace. Other’s say it’s because Go Ask Alice is an easy read. Either way you spin it, a book that receives awards from critics and bestseller lists 40 years after coming out should not be ignored.

             Originally published in 1971, this book claims to be the real diary of a teenage girl and her descent into drug abuse and addiction that started with sipping from an LSD-laced party drink. The book appropriately get’s it’s name from the Jefferson Airplane song “White Rabbit.”

            Again, Go Ask Alice can be found for under$10 just about anywhere.

Holes

By Louise Sachar

            I first read this when I was 12 years old, along with my entire 6^th grade class, so it can’t be too hard a read. In fact, even the kids who never finished a book without pictures in their life finished Holes (and loved it)! Who knew dark humor injected into a epic tale of crime and redemption could be so digestable?

            The book follows Stanley Yelnats (Stanley spelled backwards, of course) during is unjust sentence at Camp Green Lake, a juvenile detention center for boys where ‘the warden’ makes the delinquents “build character” by digging – you guessed it – holes. All day, everyday. When Stanley and his friends begin to discover just what they’re digging for, they simultaneously discover the solution to the Yelnat’s family curse.

            If you still need another reason to go out and pick up a copy, if you haven’t seen the star-studded (and, admittedly, well done) movie of the same name, promise yourself you’ll read the book first for motivation and suspense!

            At the teensy price of $6.99 at Amazon, $5.00 at your local Walmart or Target, I doubt you have a decent excuse not to read it.

Catcher In The Rye

By J. D. Salinger

           While movies and films based off of books provide great motivation to read the original, sometimes a book with no big-screen adaptation can work just as well. Think about it: How many times has one of your friends, peers, teachers, colleagues, etc. talked about Catcher In The Rye? You might think it’s overhyped and will end up disappointing you like the Blair Witch Project or adulthood, but don’t worry: Catcher In The Rye is impossible to overhype.

          You’ve heard it a million time, so I’ll just link to a synopsis of the book here but…

Bottom Line: Catcher In The Rye is a classic and favorite for a reason. If you want to seem cultured and join the conversation, read Catcher In The Rye. Simple as that. What’s more is that I can almost guarantee you’ll love it. (If not, you’ll be one of the few people on this earth who takes a strong stance against this book, in which case you’ll still be able to join said cultured conversations.)

          While newer versions of the book can be as much as $7 (big spender!), I’d actually recommend getting a used version for much cheaper. With a book so well-loved and iconic, you never know what surprises a past reader has left behind.

(Look out for next week’s post involving the unexpected treasures and benefits found in buying used books.)

Creative Nonfiction: Starbucks in the City

Starbuck's actually getting a name correct

The Starbucks Across from My Apartment

Literally every time I go to the Starbucks across from my aprartment — albeit not an often occurance — no matter what  barista they can’t hear my name they think I say “I love ya” or “A liver” or “Alli-o” and today they just wrote “E”.

I’ve taken to ordering obscure, off-menu drinks (so hip!) just so I have the security of knowing I didn’t accidentally take “A liver” ‘s drink.

But today I ordered my first dirty chai (bring on the dirty looks) following the guidance of one insert name of my boyfriend here, whom I trust deeply in all food-related matters.

“Anyone order a dirty chai?!” I call out. No response……My heartbeat speeds up. Others give me THAT look, as if to say ‘Go on, take it you crazy girl and get out of my way. TAKE IT’

And now here I sip, peering out the window every so often to make sure “E” the axe murderer hasn’t come to get me yet. 

And God bless us, every one.

What Happens When I Don't Get My Pumpkin Spice Fix

"OH GOD" I said as I spit my coffee across the room. I searched for something to wash my mouth out with as I gasped for air. 

Moments later, a barista came running out, explaining she forgot to put a Pumpkin flavor shot in. It was too late. As I laid there, dying of pumpkinstarvation, citizens stormed the baristia's house, covering her belongings in pumpkin spiced everything. They were already planning my gravestone: Here Lies Olivia, Death by Lack of Pumpkin. 

Using every last bit of my energy, I pulled out my Starbucks green card...all I could manage to spit out was "pumpkin...spiced..." "Is it latte?! She means latte!!! CODE RED EVERYONE" the cashier screamed. 

He swiftly poured an already made latte into my pumpkin-quenched mouth. They snuggled me up in a warm Urban Outfitters sweater and placed my Tumblr dashboard infront of me. I began to see pumpkins... pumpkins everywhere....

The University Starbucks

Being a student at a large, urban, would-be-an-Ivy-league-if-it-weren't-for-our-sports university, the university Starbucks is always packed. We're talking lines far out the door at all hours of the day, with a Barista (who obviously is being punished for showing up to work late) with a special headset standing and the back of the line taking your order.

I, on the other hand, get an oddly different treatment. The workers at the university starbucks have taken quite the liking to me. In fact, they all know my face, some know my name, they often let me skip  the lines and have whatever drink my little student heart desires.

Now at first it was just two of the men working there, which I found a little... unsettling. Especially since one of them seemed to be letting other, more... well let's just say "sorority" types skip ahead as well. But soon the entire staff jumped on board with me.

 I like to keep things fresh and never order the same drink to keep the ol' barista muscles on their toes. I'm surprised they don't hate me yet.

Starbucks on the Whole

Should I go to Starbucks so often when I live in a city with a million other amazing coffee shops? Probably. But between my school's dining plan, my Starbuck's green card, and straight up convenience, I always go back to you, my love, my one and only. Starbucks. 

Love you forever.  

Top 3 Bill Murray Related Songs and Their (Hilarious) Meanings

My friends & I

There was once a time when the size of the Bill Murray fandom seemed unjustly large. In fact, many bad and even downright unpleasant songs were created as so-called "musical shrines" for Bill Murray, and unfortunately the Bill Murray music world has gotten a bad rep... even to the point where the world stopped respecting our great and magnificent Murray!

But oh ho! If it weren't for old Bill's fans (or as I like to call them, Murrains) we would never be blessed with these catchy and/or beautiful songs, albums, and other forms of music listed below!

#3 Song Bill Murray

Artist: Gorillaz

My suggestion to you is get some speakers with a good bass, lie in the middle of a carpeted floor, listen to this track and let the spirit of Bill Murray enter your body.

#2 Song: Ode

Artsist: William Cody WatsonBathetic Records

A beautiful instrumental piece that pretty accurately sums up any Murrains' feelings toward the great and majestic Bill Murray.  Right now, you can listen to it FREE here. You can even get the entire album -- entitled Bill Murray LP and described by William Cody Watson himself as "The most important piece of music ever made" -- for FREE again by simply emailing in a picture of yourself celebrating Bill Murray like the fangirl you are. Click here again for more details.

#1 Song: 123456 Pokemon

Artist: Lemon Demon (a.k.a. Neil Cicierega, a.k.a. The Potter Puppet Pals guy)

For those of you who don't know already, Neil Cicierega, the creator of the Potter Puppet Pals and many other videos beloved by the internet as a collective whole, has a band named Lemon Demon. Oh, how glorious it is to see wonderful, hilarious, talented artists such as these to accept Bill Murray Our Savior into their hearts.

Now, some may argue that this song isn't 100% about Bill Murray, but I'm afraid you're not, as your english professor would say, reading the text close enough.

Here, I'll break it down for you below the video:

          Exhibit A: This man obviously has great respect for Pokemon, Barack Obama, teleportation, and the numbers 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and, naturally, 6. Placing Our Great Bill Murray not just on the same level of these great respected nouns, but even above them, truly expresses Lemon Demon's admiration for Bill Murray!

          Exhibit B: The lyric "Don't Worry, Billy Murray!" is repeated many a time in this song. Before writing it off in your mind as quirky, meaningless yet catchy hook, consider: One of the main, subliminal messages of the great Bill Murray to his Murrians is that, through Bill Murray's love and artistry, his Murrians need not "worry."

And in the end, isn't that the most important Bill Murray message of all?

Best of Netflix Instant: A Guide for Every Type of Person (The Master List)

No matter what mood you're in or who you are, I've compiled a list of the best of the best, the cream of the crop for all Netflix Instant movies and television shows. Despite my crazy, introductory image, I promise you'll never complain you've got nothing to watch ever again. Sit back, relax, and open another tab to Netflix, because as a film / movie junkie and student myself (see my introductory post), I'm sure to give you only the best recommendations. 

Documentary-Addicts:

Well, to be honest, documentary addicts have probably already seen the films below, but if you’re in the mood for one, here are the top choices:

The most obvious choices include

Exit Through the Gift Shop

Man on Wire

March of the Penguins

Food. Inc.

Being Elmo

For the Bible Tells Me So

Every National Geographic Doc ever…(almost)

Action:

For those days when you're just in the mood to watch a little violence and adventure.

Kick-Ass

The Terminator

Thor

Die Hard 2

Jackie Brown

Hobo with a Shotgun

Reservoir Dogs

Iron Man 2

The Seige

Romance & Rom-Com:

Romances so good, you'll forget you're sitting alone on your bed on a Friday night watching these movies.

Breakfast at Tiffany’s

Never Been Kissed

Notting Hill

Dirty Dancing

Last Tango in Paris

The Lady Eve

Gentlemen Prefer Blones

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Across the Universe

America’s Sweethearts

A Room with a View

Comedy Nerds to Casual Gigglers:

Are you in a bad mood and just need to watch something to get your mind off of it all? Or maybe you’re a good old fashion comedy nerd? I’ve picked out the best from all types of comedies available on Netflix!

A personal favorite: The Best Worst Movie (A documentary on the cult classic and arguably the worst/most hilarious Horror film in history, Troll 2 ) Another supposed-to-be-horror-but-laugh-out-loud-hilarious movie is Rubber… it’s a horror movie about a killer tire… yes a car tire. You’re welcome.

Movies (cont.):

Mrs. Doubtfire

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective

Hot Tub Time Machine

Arsenic and Old Lace

Spaceballs

I Love You Phillip Morris

Kicking and Screaming

Scary Movie

Dumb & Dumber

Airplane

I'm Still Here

Office Space

The Big Lebowski 

Smart Laughs: Ted Talks

Shakespeare In Love

TV:

30 Rock

The Office

Arrested Development

SNL (wide selection of episodes and specials)

South Park

Parks & Recreation

Malcom in the Middle

Portlandia

Mystery Science Theater 3000

New Dramas:

Looking for more recent yet more than decent Netflix Instant options? Perhaps you want to be "hip with the times" and talk about these most-talked-about movies and films with your friends? Look no further than this list:

Late 00’s and 10’s:

Drive

The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo

Shutter Island

Melancholia

True Grit

Earlier 00’s:

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Memento

Lost in Translation

TV:

The Kennedy’s

Mad Men

Dexter

Breaking Bad
Lost

Film Nerds: Classics, Foreign, Film Noir, & Oldies:

Are you a pretentious film student? (like me, cough cough) Here’s the stuff you should watch so your classmates don’t scoff at you as they sip their venti lattes. The best part, I’ve only listed the ones that will actually be a pleasant experience to watch.

400 Blows

Midnight Cowboy

Dog Day Afternoon

Chinatown

Metropolis

Alfred Hitchcock Presents

Apocalypse Now

Hey Boo: Harper Lee & To Kill a Mockingbird

Bonnie & Clyde

Gentlemen Prefer Blones

Apocalypse Now

Thug Life, Crime & Suspense:

Sometimes we just want to escape into a world of entertainment and adventure, and pretend we're living the thug live or solving crimes. (Or maybe you're an ex-criminal looking to reminisce. Hey, I'm not here to judge.) Here are you're top Netflix Instant Watch movies and television shows.
Personal Fav: The Perfect Host

Movies:

Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid

Mississippi

Flawless

Chinatown

American Gangster

TV:

                        Law & Order (all editions)

Horror & Unsettling:

In the mood to scream or to at least feel disturbed? Well, you’re in luck… or are you? (Insert horror soundtrack here) These films and television shows will have you biting your nails more than your taxes.

Movies:

Psycho

The Human Centipede

Paranormal Activity

The Exorcist

Night of the Living Dead

The Thing

Poltergeist
The Ring
The Others

TV:

American Horror Story

Sci-Fi, Fantasy, etc:

While some might consider these views "geeks" or "nerds," I prefer the term "relatively cool and intelligent people with socially awkward interests." Rolls off the tongue doesn't it? If anyone ever calls you a loser for it, just check out these films and television shows to remind yourself how awesome your interests are.

Movies:

Beetlejuice

Fahrenheit 451

Planet of the Apes

Donnie Darko

A Clockwork Orange

TV:

Doctor Who

Battlestar Galactica

Supernatural

FlashForward

Futurama

Mystery Science Theater 3000

Star Trek

Kids:

Everything from the littlest of tikes to bigger not-yet-hit-puberty kids

Movies & TV for Little Tikes:

Barney (Basically every Barney video ever)

Curious George

Cailou

YoGabbaGabba

VeggieTales

Dora the Explorer

Bob the Builder

Movies & TV for Bigger Kids:

Phineas and Ferb

Jimmy Neutron

Avatar

ICarly

The Suite Life on Deck

Good luck Charlie

Rugrats

Wizards of Waverly Place

Spongebob

Drake & Josh

Fairly Odd Parents

Young Adult & Teen:

Most of the options for Teens are TV shows, but there are a few movies as well. (You can also check out the Romantic Comedy or Bigger Kids list for more!)

Glee

Skins

Gossip Girl

True Blood

The Secret Life of the American Teenager

Pretty Little Liars

Greek

Kyle XY

Bring It On Again

Empire Records

Kick-Ass

Family:

You can watch any of the “kid” options I mentioned before, but if they’re giving the adults a headache, here are some family-friendly movies as well. (Note: I do not guarantee these won’t give the adults headaches)

Rango

Stuart Little

High School Musical

Matilda

Annie

Babe

The Iron Giant

A Christmas Carol

Tangled

A Christmas Story

Well, that may be the end of the list folks. But don't you worry, I'll update and repost and Netflix changes it's Netflix Instant Watch availability, as it usually does. 

Did you think I left anything out? Let me know in the comments!